Parents, our kids and being faithful in an unreliable world

We are studying through 1 Corinthians on Sundays at Calvary Chapel Gloucester and we were working through chapter when verse 2 really spoke to me. "Moreover it is required in stewards that one be found faithful." It's a simple concept and Jesus tackled it in the parable of the minas in Luke 19.

In this story Jesus told, essentially a rich ruler left of of his servants with some money and ordered them to engage in business until he returned. Some invested and traded and proved to be good stewards and were rewarded accordingly. One servant, however, put his mina in a handkerchief and did nothing, earning the ruler's contempt.

In the big picture, we can apply this parable told by Jesus to each of our lives. We're given a certain amount of time, resources and talents in this world. God expects us to be investing in the Kingdom and spreading the gospel as we await the return of Jesus. We're here to glorify God and carry out His work, quite simply. We're not asked to be brilliant, nor successful, nor dynamic, nor supermen or superwomen.

Just faithful.

If someone asked you to describe yourself, would "faithful" be a word that comes to your mind?

Would your kids use "faithful" to describe you? What words do you think your kids would use to describe you if faithful isn't one of them?

Our kids need to see us being faithful. Faithful to our spouses, to love them and speak kindly to them and to honor and cherish them. When things get hard -- and things get really hard in marriage -- they need to see us be faithful in working things out and forgiving.

Our kids need to see us being faithful in the practice of our faith. Faithful to read God's word, to pray, to be in church, to serve in church and to be faithful in our giving.

If our kids don't learn about being faithful from us, then who will they learn it from? Will they even learn about faithfulness?

Ask yourself this: What am I faithful to do? Is it work? Watch TV? Be on social media? Get your kids to every single sports practice and game? What we're faithful in reflects what's important to us. And our kids pick up on this.

In another parable, the one of the talents in Matthew 25, Jesus strikes a similar theme to the parable of the minas. Jesus lets us know we're to stay busy while He is gone, being productive and faithful with the gospel that's been entrusted to us.

The message is to use our time, money and talent for His glory to bear fruit for the kingdom. The application comes back to what each of us is going with what God has given to us.

Be faithful.

The world needs it. Our families need it. Our kids need it.

When Mama Is Away, It's Dad In Charge Of 11 Kids

Julie got away for the night, but left her mini-me Madeline behind

Julie managed to sneak away earlier this afternoon for a night away alone leaving yours truly in charge. We're at the midnight hour here at Sabo central and things are running smoothly. That's the full-blown truth. It's a well-oiled machine here when Dad is in charge.*

 Julie is heading to a Calvary Chapel pastor's wives event over in Lynchburg tomorrow -- well, technically today now that the clock has struck midnight -- and took off today with a big grin on her face.

She hit Richmond to check in on Evie at VCU, then headed to Farmville for a date with Ethan at Hampden-Sydney College and to take him shopping for socks and underwear and laundry detergent. And food. She said she loaded him up with food. I imagine he's a happy college camper tonight, even if UCLA is getting pounded in basketball.

She's staying with dear friends of ours in Farmville who live out in the country where on clear winter nights there's a million stars lighting up the sky and a lovely silence. She called me tonight and she's hunkered down in our friends' cabin, on a mattress in front of a blazing fire with her Bible and no little boys asking for chocolate milk or saying they need to go potty or arguing over toys. She sounded so happy.

Life here in the Sabo house with 11 kids present and accounted for is surprisingly smooth. Maybe it's not surprising from the standpoint of I have a crack crew of older kids who help out. Everyone got dinner, I believe some brushing of teeth took place, there are little kids in actual pajamas asleep in their beds, I said nighttime prayers ... there's checks all over the night duties checklist.

We'll see what tomorrow -- er, later today actually -- holds. I'm enjoying the quiet, but I admit I'm wishing I had a fire to fall asleep in front of in a cabin surrounded by silence beneath a starlit sky. I'm happy for Julie.

*Miracles happen every day.

Three Things Daily Bible Reading Teaches Your Kids

Madeline leads worship during a recent Calvary Chapel Gloucester baptism.

Way back in 1992 in the dusty eastern Oregon border town of Ontario, we stumbled upon Calvary Chapel. We loved the church and found it refreshing that the key element was the Bible and teaching through it verse by verse, chapter by chapter, book by book. Over the years we have attended or visited many Calvary Chapels. Now I pastor a Calvary Chapel and our family is very involved in the church, with Brenton the assistant pastor and other Sabos at various times leading worship, teaching in children's ministry, leading Bible studies and serving in other capacities.

One of the primary distinctives of Calvary Chapel is its emphasis on the Bible. We hold the Bible in high regard and consider it required reading around the Sabo house. Although we don't "make" any of our kids read the Bible daily, I know that those of the reading age take the time pretty much daily to read it. I was talking to Brenton about this earlier tonight to get his thoughts on why it's important for youth to read the Bible and what it teaches them. Here's a few thoughts.

1) Reading the Bible daily teaches discipline. The Christian life is one of discipline. Prayer, Bible reading, worship and meditating on God's word are all disciplines that separate the casual believer from one who is fervently following Jesus. It blesses me so much to see my children, even as young as elementary school age, reading the Bible daily right before bed, or in the morning when they first get up. No one asks them to do it, but they see examples set by their parents and older siblings. Being in the Word from a young age will mature them beyond their years and they will learn a discipline that is a vital part of their faith. The maturity in faith that comes from reading and knowing the Bible will extend to other areas of their lives and you will see them own their faith in Jesus from a young age.

2) Reading the Bible daily makes God's Word come alive. More than simply knowing the stories and characters of the Bible, devotional reading helps youth understand how God's Word is alive and applies to their life today. They can see how God worked through history as part of His plan to bless and save humanity through His Son and they can translate that to God working in their own lives. If they see God working in their lives, they believe He has a purpose for their lives and will be able to navigate the inevitable trials and tribulations of life because they are tethered to Jesus. A key component of having God's Word be alive and dynamic is that the Bible comes into play as a key component to making decisions. When youth learn to make decisions based on truths from the Bible they read and can apply to their lives, they are light years ahead of most adults I know -- even those in the church who aren't equipped to make good decisions because they rarely, if ever, open a Bible.

3) Reading the Bible daily serves as a counter-balance to the world. Kids these days are buffeted by an extraordinary amount of worldly enticements designed to influence their behavior. Media, advertising, technology, even the lure of sports and other passions, can all pull kids away from their walk with Jesus. Reading the Bible serves as the anchor for kids, linking them firmly and steadfastly to their Savior, Jesus Christ. One of my sons was telling a story about a friend of his in college whose life has seen remarkable maturity in faith. The difference? Even though he was a churchgoing lad and participated in his youth group at his church, he said he didn't really care to read the Bible. Since heading off to college, he started getting into God's Word and it's a key component to his new found Christian maturity.

No doubt I can come up with a whole host of other things that daily Bible reading teaches our kids. But one last thought: Name something else that would be a better way for your child to spend his or her time.

Four Things That Happen When The Kids Come Home From College

Taylor proclaims his innocence: "What?"

You can count on four things happening in the Sabo house when our kids come home from college for the weekend. The first thing is that food consumption is taken to the next level. This past weekend, Taylor came home from Berea College in Kentucky since they are on fall break and he brought his lovely girlfriend Bethany Hayes. Then Ethan sauntered over on Saturday from Hampden-Sydney College and stayed the night.

With Taylor and Ethan home, that means the Sabo cafeteria is open pretty much 24/7. I planned accordingly and rented a U-Haul truck to make the obligatory grocery run(s) and received a line of credit from the bank and transformed the garage into a walk-in cooler. (Editor's note: This is non-fiction? Did I miss something or did any of those things you just describe actually happen?) Even then, we cut it a little close judging from the look of the fridge on Monday morning. But a family that eats together (albeit in waves of relentless consumption ... picture the Chinese Army attacking our fridge and you get the idea) is a family that bonds together.

The second thing you can count on when the kids come home is that laughter echoes through the house non-stop. The board games come out after dinner and it's pretty much a laughfest from then until the wee hours of the morning. The laughing only stops when there's a pause for a run on the fridge. On Saturday night they played the "Story Game" and Skyped in Claire from Oregon. It was a riot. Julie was in bed and laughing just at all the laughing. I was laughing even though my beloved UCLA Bruins were playing football on TV and they were losing. That means one thing: It was seriously funny. If you are feeling down and blue, you don't need a shrink. Come on over for game night at the House o' Sabo. You may die of laughter, but at least you'll be happy.

Taylor offers his bestest most sincerest sorry for destroying Brenton's foot

The third thing that occurs is the inevitable massive Sabo v. Sabo ultimate soccer match on the Sabo back yard pitch. The best thing about having like, twenty-five kids (Editor's note: Um, twenty-five? Try fourteen. You really need to quit exaggerating my love ... Author's reply: It's only 14? Seriously? Love you my love.) is that you can have a really solid soccer match in the back yard when the kids come from college. You can even have one when the kids don't come from college! It's a very entertaining affair, complete with copious goal-scoring, lots of laughing and the occasionally fractured leg, er "injury" (Editor's note: Technically it's called "diving" ...) that is a hallmark of world class soccer. Brenton was hurt so seriously in the match he had to be hauled off on a cart, but fortunately he was soon able to resume competitive soccer ran right back onto the field as soon as he hit the sideline. In the end, a good time was had by all, particularly the spectators who nearly busted a gut watching the theatrics that occurred during Brenton's "injury."

Brenton is delicately hauled off the field for his potentially fatal soccer injury

The fourth thing that occurs is that Calvary Chapel Gloucester is very blessed by the guest worship team. Taylor, Ethan and Bethany, joined by Madeline, blessed the fellowship with a wonderful time of worship and praise. One of the highlights of the weekends when the kids come home is that music frequently fills the Sabo house. On Saturday in particular, when the group was preparing the worship set, it was wonderful to sit and enjoy hearing them singing praise songs to the Lord. I am a blessed man. We are a blessed family.

Succeeding In One Thing That Really Matters

Succeeding in something that matters. A Thanksgiving Sabo family soccer match.

I was walking down the hall tonight to say bedtime prayers and saw my 10-year-old son reading his Bible. No one had asked him to, it's simply a legacy handed down from his older siblings that was started by Brenton when he was a lad. Every night, without fail, I can see Abram, now 15, reading his Bible. It's always one of the highlights of my entire day. The thought struck me that my kids are doing something that matters. Francis Chan has a fairly famous quote that sums up my thoughts this evening: "Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter." 

I've thought about this quote a lot recently as I survey the landscape of American Christianity through the lens of parents. And I'm pretty darn sure we're succeeding at things that don't really matter. So many people I've known over the last several years who had been churchgoers are partaking of the youth sports elixir. They spend their Sunday mornings at the soccer, baseball, field hockey, or any number of other athletic fields, watching their kids play. And the message they are sounding loud and clear to a generation of youth is that sports is more important than church. And we wonder why Millenials and others are walking away from the church? I  would suggest one factor is that it's not important to parents.

Look, being at church for the sake of being at church -- treating it like a club -- is a whole separate subject. In our family, going to church isn't optional and subject to whichever kid's travel sports team -- or any other event for that matter -- has a game or match that morning (Disclaimer: None of our kids are on travel sports teams). But neither is it this legalistic rite we do every Sunday. Going to church on Sundays is our time to corporately and individually worship the Lord, as well as pray, study and learn Scripture and fellowship with brothers and sisters in Christ. It is vital. We look forward to it. We desire it. We are strengthened and encouraged by it. We are equipped by and through our worship, prayers and Bible studying on Sundays to navigate the travails of the week. We are also able to encourage our church family on Sundays.

At our church, Calvary Chapel Gloucester, even our young kids are studying through the Bible at their level. In the church, we study through the Bible verse by verse, chapter by chapter, book by book. Last week we studied Acts 4:1-12. Next Sunday we'll pick it up in Acts 4 verse 13. We have seen a tremendous amount of fruit in our lives and in the lives of our children in the systematic study of Scripture and prioritizing what we do on Sundays as a family. When our older kids leave the house, they choose to find a church in which to worship. It's vital to them and I thank the Lord for that. They have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. They are firm in their faith. 

I truly believe that we are succeeding in something that matters.

A Top-Ten List: Books That Have Been Required Reading

For some reason I was tagged by someone on Facebook in a post about 10 books that you've really connected with over the years. (Thanks Sean Buckout!) You know how it works. Someone tags you and you're supposed to then do essentially the same post but with your own touch, flair, explanation, words, or ice, water and bucket. I guess there's been some sort of "challenge" making the rounds of the Internet and Facebook this summer involving ice, water and a bucket? Did I get that right? Anyone know anything about that?

Anyway, here's my list of 10 books. Don't everyone get on Amazon at the same time after reading this to order off my list of books. You might crash the website.

Bible. Quite simply, required reading. Every day. I prefer the New King James Version, but there's some other solid versions out there. It has everything you'd want in a book: Divine inspiration, God's plan explained, a guide to daily living, great literature, drama, agony, love (Song of Solomon baby!), flawed characters, heroes, stories of the miraculous, prophecy, history, amazing genealogies, in-depth character development of Jesus Christ as the Messiah and our savior, the words of Jesus, including some of his prayers ... I'm thankful I can freely read it every day.

Goodnight Moon. Pritnear book perfection. Oodles of Sabo children have sat on my lap and read this story with me. We're on our fourth copy of the book, I believe. I like it so much sometimes I read it to myself at night.

Go Dog Go. I absolutely love this book. Have for decades. And I don't even like dogs! I'm allergic to them! We were at a stoplight a while back and it was a a red light. The light turned green. Judah called out: "Go Dad go! The light is green now!"

Radical. David Platt nails it in this book. An instrumental book in my Christian walk and one that helped me inspect how we spend our money. Ultimately we were led by the Lord to significantly downsize our home and cut our monthly costs by hundreds of dollars, freeing up more capital to use for the Kingdom of God.

Not A Fan. I've read this book by Kyle Idleman a couple or three times. Are you a completely committed follower of Christ? Or just a fan? Idleman breaks it down for you. I hope you'll walk away a follower of Jesus and not just a fan. We have way too many fans in America, especially in the South.

Revolution In World Missions. Warning: If you read this book your life may be radically altered. And that's a good thing.

Stories Jesus Told: Favorite Stories from the Bible. There's just something about this children's book for me ... it's simplicity, it conveys Biblical parables taught by Jesus and I love the illustrations. We've worn out two copies already.

Love: The More Excellent Way. Chuck Smith, founder of the Calvary Chapel movement, defines love and details its elusiveness. The book had a profound effect on my life and a prayer of mine over the years is for God to give me a love for people. I'm a work in progress brother.

The Tower Treasure. Every good book list must have a Hardy Boys story on it, right? I believe this is the first Hardy Boys book I read as a young lad around the second or third grade -- I taught myself to read at the age of 4 -- and I became addicted. The books fed my love of reading, an excellent passion to have.

Crazy Love: Overwhelmed By A Relentless God.  "Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter," Francis Chan writes. Boom!